Did you know that it’s possible for a hair to get wrapped around a baby’s toe so tightly that it necessitates a trip to the ER to have the hair removed so that part of the baby’s toe doesn’t have to be amputated?
This is but one of the many things you discover as mother. I happened to discover it this weekend, right after we’d moved into our new home, which we did two days after I returned to work from maternity leave. One could say it’s been an eventful week.
Along the way, I also discovered that selling a house and moving into a new one is kind of like labor. Seems like a strange comparison, right? But think about it for a moment. Putting your house on the market is kind of like being eight months pregnant. You know that your family is about go through an enormous transition. You’re scared and excited all at the same time. You spend lots of time and energy preparing for it…and then you wait. When you are pregnant, you’re waiting for labor to begin; when you are selling your house, you’re waiting for someone to buy it. In both cases, you have no idea when it might happen and all you can do is wait. You have false alarms. You wait some more. You look for signs that buyers are interested and try to guess what they are thinking. Everyone asks you when the big event is going to happen and you begin to tire of explaining that you, too, wish you knew. Just when you think you can’t wait anymore, it happens. The house sells and it’s time to move. You a bit stunned that it’s actually happening but you are beyond excited and you begin the move with tons of energy and anticipation. Then the REAL labor begins. Although you know the end result will be worth it, the process seems never-ending and you swear you will never, ever go through it again. You curse your husband for getting you into this mess. But then, just when you think you can’t stand it anymore, you finally get into your brand new house. The pain of the moving fades as you begin to discover all the wonderful things about your home. Things are sparkly and new and full of possibilities.
But I digress.
This week also led to the discovery that that the “what if” game is a lot more fun if I think happy thoughts. Before I returned to work, I woke up many nights at 3 am filled with “what ifs” about my upcoming return to work. I don’t know what it is about 3 am, but I always think my scary thoughts in that deep dark part of the night. What if Kasia won’t stop crying at daycare? What if she gets hurt? What if she won’t take a bottle? What if her daycare provider isn’t who I think she is? What if, what if, what if. Then one day in the bright sunshine of the morning, I decided I should try to turn my “what ifs” into happier possibilities. What if Kasia loves her new daycare? What if she sleeps and eats well? What if her daycare provider is a sweet, loving person who does an amazing job of taking care of her? What if Kasia has an even happier, fulfilled mom who loves her job? What if, what if, what if! I did this for a few days and found out that I didn’t have dwell on the scary possibilities. And, in fact, Kasia’s first few days with her in-home daycare provider have gone well. And I do love my job. And oh, how I love to pick her up from daycare and return to my family at home. And that’s how I discovered that I am extraordinarily lucky to have a job I enjoy and family I love and that it really is possible to have the best of both worlds.
Oh, and Kasia’s toes? They’re just fine. :)